Our conscious effort to a new routine...
Are you winging your day? This is causing stress, anxiety, overwhelming thoughts and leaving you falling short of goals and true potential. I’m all about free and whimsical, however, when it comes to the to do’s and goals the real path to productivity, our true potential, and freedom is a routine. People typically scoff at the idea of some dull robotic routine but it doesn’t have to be that way. Many successful people run on a routine that is mapped out from 4am to 9pm... I’m working on getting to that 5am club!! Routines not only give you the freedom of focus because you cut out the daily guessing game but they give you the time to focus on what really matters. Pursue your passion with purpose every single day!!! When my husband first met me I was pretty cookie cutter in my own way. I had a pretty strict schedule I followed (more of an auto-pilot mode than I am these days for sure) and I planned EVERYTHING! When we first moved in together I organized his closet and I may have also color coded it. I remember how freaked out he was by this. He used to tease me about being the “scheduler” and the “organized one”. Subconsciously over the years I abandoned this part of me. There are actually many life experiences that played part in this and looking back now I can see it left a rough pavement. Recently, my husband and I have had some very real conversations about how to transition our life and really get intentional. Due to the current climate of society, time has become our currency and our biggest asset. Getting intentional with our time has become the foundation in achieving our goals. Clynt (the hubs) always talks about the long game and I am finally grasping this in terms of my role in our team efforts of the long game… sorry babe. Anyway we are here, the time is now, and it also is evolving. The time, our growth, we just keep moving! Together we are working on the evolution of our routines and it pays!
We have gathered a ton of data (that is code for we made a lot of mistakes). So I am going to share some secrets to our sauce...
✏️ Grab something to write with. Make note of what you do each day over the course of the week. Include everything. Then write down things you aren’t doing but should or want to be doing. This will allow you to see what can get cut and what needs more focus. Now prioritize it with purpose! Once you have something mapped out follow it!! Give it a whole week. At the end of the week put some thought toward what didn’t work, change it and go again. Before you know it you’ll have something that is good for you!
“You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.” Do not bind yourself to anything in the beginning AND on the flip side to that don’t stop when it doesn’t work. I myself got so hung up on this and it wasted an incredible amount of time. Just go with it let things happen naturally and those things will show you where you need adjustments in the routine. Also if it doesn’t feel right don’t force it!
Building family routines offers consistency and security our kids need for development. Not to mention that this modeled behavior will set them up for success in the future. The predictability and familiarity that comes with a routine opens the door to the perfect “safe space” for our little ones. Frame their routine around daily habits you want them to have for the LONG GAME. I watched a video recently from a mom I admire and it brought up a whole new mindset for me with this scheduling stuff… As the mom I need protected time! You can define that however that makes you feel good. Which is the whole purpose, FILL YOUR CUP! Having a routine in place is about being intentional with your time and you deserve to fill your cup momma! Laying out all the expectations for the family will allow everyone to have more focused time. We cannot hold our family to expectations they are not aware of…
Make note of all the things you have going on and break it up...How much time do they take? Do they need more time? How can your partner help keep it on track? How can the kids help? What can they do independently that you still monitor?
This snapshot will help you decide where the focus should be. Make it fun!!! Routines don’t have to be boring. Create charts, reward systems, buddy systems, whatever you think will get them excited. Before you know it healthy habits are created and everyone is feeling the joy!!!
The early bird gets the worm, I know you have heard that! Healthy morning routines promote productivity, and give you control of the day. Affirmations, exercise, journaling, meditation, visualization, reading are some of the things you can do to get started on a positive foot! Many of us wake up and grab our phone to check notifications, sometimes even before we leave the bed. Do any of you have a no phone in bed rule in your house? Some just have it with their kids. Why not with yourself and your partner? Immediately checking our notifications or emails puts our mind in that fight or flight mode. There is no order in chaos. Find something to do right when you wake up that grounds you. What do I do? Well before I even get out of my bed I either think about what my intention for the day is or one thing that I am grateful for. I continue this in my journal. I try to journal daily about my intentions whether they be about productivity, my mood, my energy and I include gratitude. What you put out into the universe comes back to you. The more gratitude you have the more you will have to be grateful for. What are your morning habits and routines? Our current climate has changed that for everyone. It has given Clynt and I an opportunity to sit with our kids every morning, it has given us an opportunity to really capitalize on a daily routine and gain traction in productivity with projects we “have not had time for”. What stops you from having a morning routine? What would you like your morning routine to include? How can your partner help? How can the kids help? Do any of these people even know what your expectations of them is or is it just one sided? Talk about all the things so the air is clear and you have a place to start.
I focus on mornings and evenings because they are what set the tone! At the end of the day CELEBRATE the wins!!!! Make note of where you left off so you know where to start tomorrow. There should be a work day cut off time. This can be hard for work from home moms. Trust me I get it. I realized that if my kids know my expectation is to work from 10am to 3pm and they respect that then they have me after! I can and will show up for them! So I made a choice work day ends at 3pm. I am owning the accomplishments AND the things unfinished and moving on. There has to be a separation. Now, some days I go back to work, a rotation in bedtime with my partner makes that possible and same for him. Winning for the team!!!! I know his expectation, he knows mine and the ball rolls smoothly. We had to do the same with mornings for the evenings. First, what do we hate about our evenings? What do we want more of? What do we want that we don’t have? For us it went something like this… Dad gets home and we rush through dinner, off to getting ready for bed that included lots of crying and arguing and that continued all the way to good night. Now I am crying over a glass of wine feeling like I failed the day. Our son hated going to bed, it was ALWAYS A BATTLE. Our daughter usually was alone in her room. NOT my ideal evening! Some nights we attempted meditation or yoga but nothing was consistent. From that snapshot we decided what we wanted and didn’t want. We made a conscious decision to change it and put in the effort to make it work. The effort also includes unteaching the unhealthy habits we had already created and that often comes with combative attitudes.
Ultimately there is no golden path. Communication with your people will get you the data necessary to create routines and habits that work for everyone!! I spent so many hours putting together routines that looked good for me. No wonder they didn’t work. I attached all the negative emotions that came with that failure to everyone else in my family and actually it was me holding them back by keeping them out all along. AND I felt the like day owned me. DONE WITH THAT. I create my journey and now I am owning that statement and putting in the work to make it happen.
Champions are built in DAILY PRACTICE!
CHANGE YOUR CHOICES.
CHANGE YOUR LIFE.